Day 7 of Self-Discipline Challenge

     I definately exercised self-discipline yesterday, primarily in the area of emotional and verbal self-control. At work, I have been doing damage-control and being very diplomatic while an employee "situation" which never should have happened has been unfurling and unravelling over the past few days. As always, I am in the uncomfortable position between a rock and a hard place, navigating a land mine while trying to push a rope uphill. The invisible duct-tape keeping me from verbally unloading is the realization that I can't control anyone else's behaviours, and ultimately, they are accountable for outcomes of events they create.
     In the afternoon, I had some medical appointments to take care of and decided to be early rather than stressed out and late for them. In preparation for a scheduled surgery later this month (nothing serious!), I had to swing by the surgeon's office to pick up my hospital prep package, then head off to my 3:30 pre-admitting appointment at the hospital. En route to the hospital, I realized I was 45 minutes early. Self-discipline was exercised in not stopping off at Ikea (across the road from the hospital, how convenient!) to kill some time, because I knew one can shop fast there but getting through the cashier lines is a whole other exercise in self-control and patience. So I headed to the GO Station parking lot (thus dodging the hospital's crazy parking rates), parked, and headed in early to my appointment.
     I was all ready to sweet-talk the nurse into taking me early, when she advised me I was right on time. Apparently I was booked for 3:00, however, the surgeon's secretary had told me 3:30. Forget being late, had I been on time I would have missed my appointment. Cripes. Good thing I was early. All went well and it wasn't too bad, despite having to go for blood tests in the lab. I didn't even faint this time.
     The ultimate demonstration of self-discipline, the piece de resistance, however, occurred at dinner last night. After a trying week and promises to myself that there would be wine at dinner (oh yes, there will be wine!), when we got up this morning, I remarked to Cameron how odd it was that we drank less than a bottle of wine last night. While I claim this is self-discipline, I suspect on my part it was just plain exhaustion and not wanting to have wine flu the next day. The kicker, however, was I still woke up with a headache this morning. How is that fair?
     At any rate, today I've knocked a few things off my list of things I don't want to do but have to, and am waist-deep in organizing our linen closet. Sounds simple but if you saw the explosion of bedding, tablecloths and one facecloth for every child in America, you wouldn't believe it all fit in there in the first place. All I want to know, aside from the meaning of life, is what exactly is the right way to fold a fitted sheet?

Self-Discipline Challenge - Day 5 check in

     I'm 5 days into my "self-discipline challenge" and I'm feeling kind of "meh" about my progress. First the good news - I've gotten through some yuckaroo tasks:

• cleaned the cache of horrors under Lauren's high-chair seat cushion
• filed the 2009 T5500 (cross referencing T5558) to the IRS, for my company's 401(k) (In plain English: boring, necessary, complicated paperwork for the U.S. government)
• signed Austin up for Cub Scouts
• exercised patience while ensuring Austin's guitar practice occurred
• accomplished some gift shopping for 2 kids' birthdays and a business event

     I am, however, disappointed and a bit concerned about my performance vis-a-vis being able to get out of bed in the morning. My Day 2 commitment (and the only commitment I set for that day) was to only hit the 'snooze' button once. An hour later and close to 8 snooze whacks later, it plain did not happen. Same story for Day 4 and Day 5. What's worse is our persistent and at times annoying cat is my back-up alarm clock, nipping and poking my chin incessantly from the sound of that first "beep" of the day. You'd think I'd say "to hell with it" and get up, rather than pulling the covers over my head and hoping the cat would go bother Cameron instead.
     Ah, but what about Day 3 you ask? Well, Day 3 was no problem because I was anxious to see an article in the Globe & Mail, in which I'd been interviewed and my family photographed with respect to breaking news about medical breakthrough for Pre-Eclampsia.  Admittedly, pulling off the interview and photoshoot on virtually no notice was definately a sign of commitment on my part, but I find it worrisome that it takes a media event to get me out of bed on time. It was all for a good cause, the Pre-Eclampsia Foundation, so I'll cut myself some slack and give myself kudos that I managed to get up on time once this week.
     Tomorrow I will try again to take my alarm clock seriously. And the darn cat. Maybe she can get me out of bed on time. Truly, the ultimate test of self-descipline boils down to "Can I get up in the morning?" Let's see what tomorrow brings.

Self-Discipline Challenge - Day 1

     I've often wondered what results I'd get if I actually followed through and did the things I know I ought to, rather than making excuses and fluffing these things off. I'm referring to getting up early (versus after an hour's worth of hitting the 'snooze' button) and working out, going to church, getting the house organized, getting together with friends and family (versus "We should do lunch soon...") etc.
     My friend S. is the most disciplined person I know. I'm not sure if it's her personality or her policing background that created this characteristic in her, but she is definately someone who Gets Stuff Done. Her house is organized and decorated (versus mine still painted builder's white after 8 years), the family schedule is full of interesting activities, she is in fantastic shape, has a busy and illustrious career, and gets up at 5:00 a.m. to bake muffins for her family. As Bree VanDerCamp as this sounds, there is nothing Stepford about her and she's as real and passionate as they come. Compared to S., I am a serious slacker.
     Yesterday, as I moved at tortoise speed due to a mild touch of wine flu, accomplishing nothing on my to-do list, I decided I would challenge myself to 21 days (that's how long it takes to make or break a habit) of self-discipline. This doesn't mean driving myself into the ground with impossible expectations and burnout looming on the horizon. Rather, I would make a handful of commitments to myself to keep each day. A long list of "to-do's" that can't be accomplished is not realistic or self-supporting. I also decided it would be important to make some self-care and me-time commitments for the list as well, so it's not just all work, no play. And, I also decided a few mulligans would be made available for the extreme cases where I just didn't have it in me to make it happen. Ideally, I will use no more than 1 mulligan per week. So I've got a few 'outs' to keep things comfortable. Us slackers need outs as a safety net!
     So my commitments for today were to get up, work out in the gym, shower, wash my hair, shave my legs (I hate shaving my legs and you wouldn't believe the excuses or disguises I use to get away with long periods between leg scrapings), take the kids to church, get some laundry done today, and finish cleaning up our dining room. It was a fight to get out of bed rather than rolling over, when Cam got up to feed Lauren her breakfast. But I did it, made it downstairs to the gym, and actually worked out. And it was a real workout, not just schlumping along on the treadmill, watching t.v., pretending to break a sweat. Proudly checked off the entire showering checklist.
     The challenge was in getting to church. Austin will easily go to the Catholic church, however, I wanted to attend my church, affectionately known in our house as the "rock 'n' roll" church, which is more of a relaxed community-based congregation and an approach based more on content than on ritual. As I felt the excuses welling up inside me (I don't want to argue with Auz, it looks like rain, Lauren will miss her nap) I reminded myself of my commitment  and went anyhow. Lauren went into the nursery no problem ("Hey, more people to party with! Great!"), but Austin was teary and nervous (doesn't like new situations) and had to remain with me until his pals Ben and Luke showed up. The after-church recap from Auz was that despite the video games, movie ("lame"), floor hockey, Lego, and basketball, he'd rather sit through the service at the Catholic church than whoop it up at Rock'n'Roll church Sunday school. Auz is truly a man who sticks to his convictions. Lauren, on the other hand, wouldn't leave the nursery and kept trying to crawl back in when I was trying to sign her out.  Me, I had a lovely experience, re-connected with some of my MOPS moms' group acquaintances, and enjoyed the music, the service, and the company around me.
     The laundry is started, so I can say that commitment is under way. Of course I'll have to follow through and remember to fold and put away the clean clothes, which is 75% of the battle for me. Our dining room has been the defacto storage area for all our basement items while we renovated the basement. Trunks, Rubbermaid totes, renovation receipts, and numerous tchotchkes await me to deal with them. I'm off to get that done, so I can sit, relax, and read a book guilt free. I realize it's only day one and there are rocky roads ahead, but I think I can say I'm off to a good start in keeping my commitments.

Grocery Shopping - Saving vs. Sanity

     Tonight I stopped off at No Frills to pick up some groceries on the way home. It's been a while since I've darkened the door of The Frill, as I've been shopping at our neighbourhood Sobeys instead. On my way out, as I looked at my $70.00 No Frills bill and estimated it would have cost easily $90.00 - $100.00 at Sobeys, I couldn't help but wonder, what's the dollar value of a pleasant grocery shopping experience?
     No Frills used to be my regular grocery store. Their produce is fresh, they have all the great No-Name and President's Choice products I love, and it's a cheap place to shop. And, of course, there's my admiration for Galen Weston, but that's a whole other story for another time. Lately, however, the downside of The Frill has caused me to pay premium prices at Sobeys.
     Let's compare: At No Frills, based on their clientele demographic, you have to deposit a quarter for your cart. At Sobeys, you have your choice of 3 cart sizes (regular, mini, and "shopper in training" kids' carts) and no deposit is required. At No Frills, navigating through the store is a bit of a competitive event with the occasional unpleasant outburst. One time I saw two women come to fisticuffs in the meat department. It was an eye-opener for me and it answered my question about what comes next after someone sucks their teeth at another woman. Quite the sociological cultural study event while grabbing some grocs. But, I digress.  At Sobeys, I look forward to (figuratively) running into friends from the neighbourhood, which is great for socializing while shopping, but not so great when you're a fright with no makeup, schlumpy clothes, and bedhead. This look, by the way, is more common among Frills shoppers.
     Sobeys has a deli counter. No Frills doesn't. Sobeys has cookie club. The only free cookies at No Frills are the ones that get shoplifted. As frivolous as these little perks seem, deli samples, free cookies, and of course, the lobster tank all provide the kind of mid-shop entertainment my kids need to keep my sanity.
     The prices at Sobeys, as I alluded previously, are considerably higher for the most part. Tonight at The Frill, I picked up some Lean Cuisines for $1.99 each, which would most likely cost $3.00+ at Sobeys. A family pack of pork chops was $6.25, compared to $8.00 - $9.00 at Sobeys. A triple pack of baby wipes refills for $3.99, typically runs about $6.00 at Sobeys. I'm not sure what they'd cost at Sobeys but my $0.77 head of romaine lettuce, $0.87 English cucumber, $1.77 bag of bagels, and $0.47 can of tomato paste all struck me as bargoons.
     I think the heart of the matter is how much stress you're prepared to put up with while doing groceries. While I was in No Frills during the evening rush, I didn't have the kids with me, so the crazies running around with their carts were a source of entertainment to me rather than antagonization. Bagging my own groceries was no big deal, because no one was trying to climb out of the cart or leave the store without me. I didn't need to take anyone to the fish counter to threaten them with a fish with its face still on for dinner, if they didn't behave. I kind of missed saying "hi" to the lobsters but I enjoyed hearing a loud exchange between a daughter and her elderly mother, with their lyrical West Indian accents and colloquial grammar. It was quite endearing and I am always a sucker for a foreign accent.
     So I have to say, if I can hold it together and put up with the nonsense, especially with my children in tow, an extra $20-30 saved at No Frills is worth it. Sometimes, however, our time, sanity, and relationships with our kids requires making the call to spend the extra dough and have a far more pleasant experience. As I always say, experiences are everything and we need to honour ourselves and our kids sometimes by saying "We're worth it."

The Simple Life

     I'm in a space right now where I'm trying to figure out who I am, what I'm doing, and what I want. I wouldn't call it a mid-life crisis; it's more of a mid-point check in. Until recently I've been running at top speed going and doing, but never pausing to think about being. With the best intentions, I gave of myself to the point of being on auto-pilot and no longer having a voice. A complete crash and burn, hysterical freak-out woke me up and helped me to articulate that this was not working and that immediate changes were necessary.
     Over the past few months, I've been working on saying "no", asking for help (rather than being the control freak who has to manage everything perfectly), and using my voice to say what needs to be said, including "Be quiet, I'm speaking here. I will give you a chance but first hear me out." In doing this, I have started to find time and space to reflect and think about what I want, what my priorities are, and what needs to be let go. The more I do this, I realize that simplicity is key in this complicated, high-speed world.
     Pretty ironic, coming from me, the Queen of Complicated. Not to be confused with 'high maintenance', which refers to behaviours, my complications stem from conditions and situations that either pre-exist or have been created by myself or others when I've allowed them. Complications in pregnancies, complicated family situations, complicated workplace dynamics, complicated religious backgrounds, complicated schedules, complicated renovations, recipes, and arrangements. Ask me a question that anyone else would respond to with a straight answer, and I'll always start my commentary with, "Well, there's a bit of a story..."
     Because all this can be quite exhausting, it has become important, no, necessary, for me to start simplifying the heck out of everything else in my life. Aside from decluttering and organizing our home, slowing down, observing, and savouring the immediate moment are things I'm learning to do and enjoy. For example, I took a vacation day from work today for some "me time". I read a book while drinking coffee in the sunshine, savoured an al-fresco lunch of flavourful of farm-fresh egg omelette and tomatoes, and spent some time admiring my tidy house courtesy of our house-cleaner.
     I do recognize there is a price tag attached to all of these - time away from work, the 2 kids in daycare (my guilt eliminated by the eldest asking to go there today, and knowing me-time is important because if Mama ain't happy, ain't no one happy), and the financial cost of someone else cleaning the house. But it's worth it, and for me, necessary. Things are less complicated this way and I am a believer in spending more on experiences than I spend on things. Not to say money buys happiness - I know a very wealthy individual who, in the pursuit of happiness, finds joy in destroying others' self esteem. The core of what I'm getting at is pausing to be present in the moment, breathe deeply, and have gratitude for the people, experiences, and good things like health, in one's life.
     In my search for simplicity, I write more, I think more, I listen to music and stare out the window a lot, enjoying "our garden across the road" in my neighbours' yard, and I find in this I am starting to figure things out. The dots are starting to connect and while I don't have a plan, I am starting to have an inkling of what I enjoy, what's going on my bucket list, and what I might want to try doing. A cup of tea, the cat curled in the sun, trees rustling, these are priceless, simple things. An uncomplicated situation - I couldn't ask for anything more, and in this, I am content.
  

Cheap Entertainment - An Ode to Kingston Road

     The Scarborough section of Kingston Road is not only my regular commute route, but is a major source of sightseeing entertainment for what would otherwise be repetitive to-ing and fro-ing on weekdays. The section I see most, from the bridge over the Rouge River valley to St. Clair, if it were a person, would be that slutty, edgy girl we whispered about in high school. She's a fast ride, flashy but not pretty, kinda dirty, and although you'll go there, you don't want to be seen by anyone. Try as you might to have better success with her classier sister, the 401, Highway 2's way easier.
     It's the contrasts and the unexpected that provide the shock-value entertainment. It's a reality tv buffet as you drive along. The gentrified West Hill types live on the edge of denial and a stone's throw from a raft of hourly-rate motels, such as the Howard Johnson's, posing as an "inn" and the Maple Leaf Motel with its "Honeymoon Special". The Starbucks patio is dotted with chain-smoking, Tim Horton's cup-toting folk who you can tell from an intersection away are not the usual "Bux" demographic. There is a brazen scrabbling for survival evident all around. Skinny hookers pretend to hitch-hike. I was initially puzzled by their broad-daylight business model, until I realized opportunity knocks for these ladies 24/7, not just at night.
     The businesses along the way offer insight as well. The Decent Funiture store (no, that's not a typo) offers dinnet (again, not a typo) sets and mattresses. Surprisingly, Crack Master is a glass repair shop, which I suppose makes sense, although I tend to alternate between images of a drug dealer and that of a big ol' plumber butt. The Loan Arranger is a car dealership, most likely for folks with more concerns about money than what kind of vehicle they need.  Spas on this stretch are not anything like Ste. Anne's. Blinds drawn, their signs tout "European Attendants" rather than listing manicures/pedicures, waxing etc. I suspect the only waxing going on is that of someone's Johnson. Off-Track Betting, the bank where a police horse was shot dead a few years ago, the Buddhist temple that was firebombed twice last year; there are stories being told all along this street, every second of the day.
     Don't get me wrong, it's not all seedy. Consider the sea of tulips planted alongside the road, by a group of homeowners in Orchard Park, seemingly for the enjoyment of the commuters. And some of Toronto's best audio video retailers are found along this stretch. G & G Electronics and Musonic both do booming businesses, pardon the pun. Indeed, there are pockets of normal, including Guildwood where as newlyweds, my husband and I lived in a nice condo right on Kingston Road. And there are signs of improvement, lots of townhome developments and positive changes, although I would require some persuasion to buy one of the end units in the thick of the action. Hopefully the family scene depicted on the builder's bill-board will play out for the soon-to-be occupants of this development, in harmony with their ghetto-fabulous Galloway neighbours. Ice cream cones and wide-open-mouth smiles all around for everyone. But hey, if Habitat For Humanity can successfully build and integrate a mixed Protestant/Catholic neighbourhood in Northern Ireland, anything is possible here.
     Occasionally I'll see regular folk walking their dogs or out for a run, but other times I'll see helmet-less, cigarette-smoking young men on bicycles, riding along the sidewalks, dressed like Trailer Park Boys cliches. I fight the urge to yell out the window, "Wear a helmet and get off the sidewalk!" Better to mind my own business, you don't know how someone might react.
     As traffic slows, my automatic reflex always is to hit the "door locks" button. Looking beyond the vehicles of fellow Kingston Road commuters, I scan the faces at the bus stop. We are all doing the same thing. We wait patiently, we commute wearily, cautiously optimistic and hopeful for better things for ourselves and our families. We're not so different after all. 
    
    
    

Don't Hate Me Because I'm Beautiful

Yes, I am totally showing my age, quoting a  Pantene commercial from the 80's. I was trying to think of a cute title for this entry, which is a smattering of beauty tips, as suggested by Chelo, a style icon in my office. So, in no particular order:

• Save your money on eye-makeup remover. Having used hotel bottles of hand cream for years as my makeup remover, I'm now "splurging" on Avon eye-makeup remover, which is currently on sale for $0.99/bottle from Peggy, my friendly neighbourhood Avon lady. Of course full price is around $3.00 so still not expensive. Steer clear of the $25 department store removers. Far too expensive. Either that, or if that's all that works for you, consider the cleaning products aisle in the grocery store instead. Just kidding. Don't do that but you get the point.
• More of a hair-saver than a money-saver - don't wash your hair every day unless it absolutely needs it. As a blonde who is processed within an inch of her life, if I were to shampoo frequently, I would be sporting a frizzy mop rather than my fairly healthy tresses. I'm not suggesting you walk around with dirty hair, but really consider whether the wash can wait another day. You can also cheat a bit with baby powder stroked through your roots to soak up excess oil, but make sure you don't leave streaks of white powder on your face or people will wonder about you.
• Never use soap on your face. Use a proper cleanser, or you will wind up spending way more than you need on anti-aging products and maybe cosmetic procedures down the road after you've dried out your face with soap.
• Shave your legs with baby oil rather than spending money on shaving lotions or shaving foam. And while you're at it, a good razor will do. There is no need for one of those quadruple blades with moisturizer heads in girly colours and goddess commercials on t.v.
• Buy your cotton balls at the dollar store.
• Spend your money on moisturizers, creams, etc. You can save using drugstore brands but don't feel too guilty splurging on moisturizing and protecting your skin.
• Wear sunscreen. Always. All year. I like to use a tinted moisturizer with sunscreen in it. Pretty much every cosmetic brand has this in their line, and you get a smooth look while protecting your face from sun damage. I like the Neutrogena ones, and the Sonia Kashuk ones.
• Alternate between nail shop manis/pedis, and DIY ones at home. While we all enjoy the relaxation and benefit from a good foot scraping, odds are you are quite capable to do it yourself and your nail polish collection may be nicer than at the nail shop.
• Don't wear cheap perfume. Ever.
• Eat properly, exercise, and get proper rest. You are only as beautiful on the outside as what you feed yourself on the inside. And be nice - mean people are ugly on the inside and on the outside.

So there's the quick and dirty list. And I'll leave you with another beauty quote from the past. In the early 90's, supermodel Linda Evangelista was quoted as saying, "I don't get out of bed for less than 10 thousand dollars." Now that's champagne taste!

Target Reunion

     Last week when I visited my Buffalo office, I finally got my long-awaited Target fix. It was a reunion of sorts, having not had any red cart romance since early November. I had to make it a quick visit since I left the office late and still had the 2 1/2+ hour ride home ahead of me, not counting any possible time-consuming shenanigans at the border.
     I was impressed by the selection of spring dresses, cardigans and tops. Lots of brightly coloured sheaths, very much like you see in Mad Men. Unfortunately, none of them fit my skinny-yet-flabby post-baby body. I reassured myself that this disappointment might be fixed in a few weeks with a trip to Ann Taylor, where the clothes tend to fit me better.
     Another disappointment was my realization that Isaac Mizrahi has left the building. I never had a lot of luck with his clothes, but the shoes and accessories were always fabulous. In fact, as I stood scanning wallets, looking to replace my current white Mizrahi one which is showing signs of age, that's when the thunderbolt of realization hit that my beloved Isaac had ended his red cart romance. Sigh.
     So, I made my usual rounds and picked up some basics. Tom's of Maine lavender-scented natural deodorant for $4, as opposed to twice that in Canada. Sonia Kashuk tinted moisturizer with SPF 15 @ $13, Boots No. 7 translucent powder stick ($13), and No. 7 Extravagant Lashes mascara ($8). Also hit the food areas, scoring Easter chocolate bargains, baby cereal, and Target's private label version of Lucky Charms for about 1/3 of the branded version's price. No go with toothpaste, which seemed to be more expensive than what I usually buy at home.
     I'm feeling a bit disappointed with my red cart romance reunion. Maybe it was the rushed visit rather than my usual lingering glances around the store. Maybe it's Isaac's marked absence. Maybe it's my disappointment in the No. 7 mascara, which goes on like wet, brown children's watercolour paints and makes my lashes look gunky. I don't know, but I will explore my feelings again at another visit soon. Perhaps MY red cart romance is ending and I've outgrown Target? It's not you baby, it's me...
     I did, however, discover CCRA has hired a fresh batch of young, cute border customs agents. While the shopping wasn't great, it was painless, almost pleasurable, confessing my (minor) shopping sins to the hot but young enough to be my son customs agent. Now if that's not a silver lining, I don't know what is.

It's all about the food

     Friday was Cameron's 39 again and again and again birthday and it was Lauren's 8-month birthday. While driving home from work, trying to distance myself from the chaos cyclone that had swept through my work-week, I phoned out for pizza and wings. The plan was to pick up Auz and Lauren from daycare, then drive up the block and pick up our dinner to take home. Of course, the best-laid plans always go awry, especially when Murphy and his laws seem to follow me like a fat kid on a Smartie.
     Arrived at the daycare to find Lauren showing signs of pinkeye, which she had picked up from a colleague who looked suspiciously pink in the eye the day before. So, while Auz, Lo, and I went to the local walk-in medical clinic, poor Cam had to drive out to the pizza joint, pick up, and pay for dinner. Happy birthday, honey! Lauren, by the way, did indeed have pinkeye, but was seen and diagnosed very quickly and we were able to pick up her script from the pharmacy and be home in a reasonable time frame, thank goodness.  And, 2 days later, she is already looking and feeling much better.
     Last night we had a birthday dinner party at our house, with our good friends Russ and Allison. Feeling guilty about the previous evening's debacle, I decided I was going to have to up the ante in terms of the glamour-factor of the meal. It was time for a little Champagne Taste on a beer budget magic.
     Austin and I headed for McEwan at the Shops at Don Mills . The Shops at Don Mills is the latest version of a long-standing shopping centre location at Don Mills Road and Lawrence Avenue East. It used to be a typical suburban mall, across the road from my high school (Don Mills Collegiate), where myself and many of my friends worked after school. A lot like the tv show, 6Teen, come to think about it.
     McEwan is the fine food retail store of celebrity chef Mark McEwan, who also has a number of fabulous restaurants around Toronto. One of his restaurants, North 44, is my favourite restaurant. Unfortunately, it is one of those places that's great to go to when it's a corporate event and you can expense the bill, but much as I love the place, I have yet to go there on my own dime. Same goes for my other favourite restaurant, Spago in Beverly Hills. At any rate, the retail outlet sells prepared foods and all kinds of gourmet food items and crazy expensive versions of the basics.
     Arriving at McEwan, Auz and I decided to bypass the valet parking and found a very close parking space without having to suffer the embarrassment of a car jockey driving my car with coffee cups, baby toys, hats, scarves, mitts, used Kleenexes, gum wrappers, and a ton of gas station receipts rattling around with him. That and I knew as soon as I were to tip him, Austin would be looking for a hand-out as well.
     Once inside the store, we quickly found what we needed: freshly-prepared maple walnut squash, rapini with garlic and chilis, brussels sprouts with caramelized onion and bacon, some fabulous super-creamy St. Andre cheese, and Kozlik's Canadian Maple mustard. Auz guilted me into buying him some cookies and while they weren't just any cookies, they were McEwan devil's fudge white chocolate chip cookies, I thought $8.95 for 1/2 dozen was a bit nuts, but if it stopped the "Can we go to the Pickering Flea Market?!" whining, it was worth the dough. We also ate our way through all the sampling tables and particularly enjoyed the variety of salsas and dips being offered.
     Our little trip to McEwan for a handful of items cost $57, but keeping in mind I wouldn't have to prepare any of the side dishes, fabulous food with no labour on my part is well worth it, I think. I just couldn't get over the people shopping there for basics, like an $18 smallish bag of coffee. I wanted to shake their shoulders and point them to the nearest No Frills, or even just a regular groc shop. From what I could gather, the fine food experience is a bit of an ego booster as well, so maybe it's worth the mark-up on basics if it's cheaper than a trip to the shrink.
     We rounded out the meal planning with a trip to Longo's, where salmon filets and jumbo shrimps were on special for $1.99/lb (as opposed to something in the neighbourhood of $13/lb at McEwan) and we nabbed some artisinal bread to go with the cheese. Naturally, we also made a trip to the LCBO for a pile of wines. The meal, by the way, worked out really well, and everyone seemed to enjoy it. I loved not having to worry about cooking anything except for the fish and a bit of rice.
     Over dinner, knowing my love for second-hand and consignment shops, Allison mentioned that the local Goodwill store has 1/2 price sales every Friday. "Wow! That's amazing!", I remarked. "Just think - I could buy Austin's jeans for $1.50 a pair instead of $3.00!" (The kid burns through at least one pair a week.)  As soon as I said that, I started to laugh. "I'm worrying about knocking down jeans from $3 to $1.50 and meanwhile, we're eating designer veggies from McEwan." Truly, if that doesn't sum up my whole Champagne Taste on a beer budget philosophy, I don't know what does. Cam just looked at me and said, "You know, it IS all about the food." So true. Thanks and happy birthday, honey.
    
    

Back to Work Recap

     Well, it's been a while but I'm back. My last post was just prior to our family ski vacation, which was immediately followed by my return to work from maternity leave. Since then, despite the crazy, hectic pace, I've managed to continue exploring the world of living on a beer budget but enjoying champagne tastes.
     I'd originally thought I would splash out and buy some new items for my work wardrobe but to date, I haven't. I've found that despite being a couple years old, my suits, blouses, etc. are feeling new-ish to me because I didn't wear them at all last year when I was pregnant. Also, things are fitting me differently due to weight-loss and the mysterious shape-shifting that occurs with women's bodies, post-pregnancy, leaving us with totally different skinny spots and trouble zones than before. Plus, with a bit more weight-loss as a motivator, I am holding out on buying anything new so as not to wind up with brand new clothes that are too big and unwearable. Now that I am through the having babies phase, I've vowed not to have multiple clothing sizes in my wardrobe any more.
     I can't even begin to describe how exciting it was to get that first paycheque after my return to work. I could have hugged our Payroll Administrator and I had such a warm moment, checking my bank balance online. However, despite the feeling of having won the jackpot, I have not gone crazy living the life of someone who earns a decent living. Rather, I've continued to make and take my lunch to work pretty much every day. Weeknight dinners are simpler and cheaper, with my crockpot working overtime for Cam, Auz, and I, and the blender continuing to churn out homemade baby food for Lauren. Weekend meals have been a bit fancier, but as I always say, I'd rather blow the budget on a home-made meal than spend that same money on an okay meal at a restaurant. That lesson was reinforced last weekend during a slow-service, mediocre dinner at Casey's while juggling a crabby, tired baby.
     Not to say I haven't been spending money. My Visa bill came in last week with an "ulp!" factor of $8,000, but it was primarily for all the items bought at Lowe's, Home Depot, and Rona for our basement renos. I am talking truckloads of stuff. I was lucky enough to have my friend Jenna do a pre-purchase scout out with me, to get me focused on all that I would need to choose and her fabulous taste and know-how really helped me make smart and organized choices. The actual purchasing visits had the joyous feel of a spending spree without the scare of buyer's regret afterwards. What was funny, though, was that Visa flagged a fraud-alert on my account, with the first big purchase going through like an elephant through a python. I guess that big spend was so out of character for me that the folks at Visa were being cautious, which I appreciated, as I also appreciated the validation of not being a regular big spender. At any rate, the renos are nearly there, and I am so looking forward to having a finished basement with a dead-sexy bathroom, real soon. Point to note: I had saved and budgeted for the reno, with the money already put aside to cover the Visa bill (I charged it to get the Visa rebate dollars) so please don't think for a moment I am advocating spending sprees on credit.
     I must confess, however, that my old frivolous habit at work has cropped up again, and what I am referring to is my Starbucks addiction. Right now it's about a weekly skinny vanilla latte habit, but as any little addiction problem evolves, it's a slippery slope. However, if a latte warms the cockles of my heart on a stressful day at work, it's a far more responsible option than say, drinking at lunch or tearing a strip off the resident office bully. All in moderation, my friend.
     So that about brings us up to speed. I promise more regular posts now that I am back into somewhat of a groove. Cheers!
   

Target Targetting Canada

     When I walked into the kitchen this morning, Cameron waved the newspaper at me and said, "Target is coming to Canada!" While he is not in the throes of a red cart romance, he knows I am. My love for Target has grown over 9 years of work-related cross-border trips to Buffalo and plenty of high-speed marathon shopping events at the red retailer.
      According to the Toronto Star article, as part of Target's international (a global red cart romance? Oh yes!) expansion, they plan to be in Canada in 3 years' time. Originally it was thought they'd buy and take over Zellers, but that didn't happen. Much as I appreciate Zellers for having provided me with my first H.R. job and my husband (how's that for an H.R. faux pas - fishing off the company pier!), as a retailer, they are so behind the times. Lousy selection and not the greatest pricing. Wal-Mart is great for basics and has cheap prices, but it just doesn't compare to Target, which is in a league of it's own.
     I love Target because it is upscale cheap chic. Their buyers are just as cutting-edge as upscale retailers, and realizing consumers want current, trendy, and stylish products at a lower price, they strive to not just satisfy them, but to wow them.
     When I visit Target, I take a two-pronged approach. I have a mental shopping list of specifics to buy, but I focus primarily on tuning my radar to fabulous items and deals. First stop is always the ladies' fashions. Usually, there is a rack of "guest designer" clothes, a collection made by a designer specifically for Target, and is only there for about a month. This is a similar strategy to H&M's approach. For example, last year there was a line of clothes in Target, designed by Proenza Schoeler.
     The clearance rack is also pretty good. I bought a long-sleeved t-shirt for $2.00 last year to wear on a ski trip. I've also had luck with the Merona line of classic clothes, always good for business-wear. The Isaac Mizrahi fashions are hit and miss for me, but his shoes are quite good and my white Mizrahi wallet has received many compliments. I've also had great luck with the Gilligan & O'Malley line of bras. For example, I recently bought a nursing bra for $14.00, while normally one of those would set you back at least $30.00 anywhere else.
     Around the store I continue. The cosmetics department is fantastic. Sonia Kashuk, Boots No. 7, and Pixi are some of the interesting lines they carry, in addition to the usual drugstore-brand suspects. On to the shoe department for inexpensive, stylish pumps and flats. Last year I bought Austin a pair of Crocs knock-offs for $3.00.
     Kids' clothes are pretty good, but I usually buy used for my shorties. I've not really examined the mens' department (sorry Cam!) and while the Liz Lange maternity clothes were quite attractive to me last year, I'd already built my maternity wardrobe and resisted the urge to buy more.
     On to the hard goods, where I spend most of my time in the home goods aisles. Hotel quality (high thread count) sheet sets for crazy cheap prices. Nice blinds and drapes. Seasonal table-wear to lose your mind over without blowing your budget. Small appliances (like a programmable Crockpot for for $19.99.) Home decor items that are current and stylish. All the time I'm doing the math and figuring out how much is reasonable to bring through Customs. (side note: I declare everything. Never, ever, ever, lie to Customs. Right, Cam?)
     A little browsing in the food aisles (great variety of coffees and the store brand, Archer Farms is darn good) for brands and items not available in Canada. Final stop is usually in the pharmacy area. Here is where I'll find Target brand items that are only available as name-brand in Canada. I scored an infra-red ear thermometer last Fall for $19.99 under the Target brand, when all I could find in Canada were name-brand ones for upwards of $70.00. I've also been known to buy store-brand "family planning" items like ovulation kits, pregnancy tests, and KY. Last but not least, I pick up Tom's of Maine deodorant at half the price than charged at home, and salon brand hair products about 1/3 cheaper.
     Another way to shop Target is online, where they have an even broader range of products, especially in the home furnishings area. What's great is consumers post reviews of products they've bought or tried. Target shoppers are a loyal bunch and are happy to take the time to review products. What I've done is researched items in advance, and then bought them at the store in-person.
     Since I can't shop Target as regularly as I like, I don't consider myself an expert. More of a cross-border Target admirer. There are, however, a number of blogs dedicated to this rabid love for Target that its loyal shoppers have. My favourite is Slave To Target, which was the first to coin the phrase "red cart romance", that pretty much sums up my sentiments towards this amazing, fun, cheap chic retailer.

Cook it, baby, cook it!

     Over the past 2 weeks, I've started cooking for the youngest member of our household. At her doctor's suggestion, Lauren started solids a month ago and once she'd settled nicely onto baby rice cereal, I started integrating pureed vegetables, which I cook myself. It seems to be going well. Lauren's a huge fan of sweet potatoes, is okay with turnips, but is not a lover of carrots. The "ewww yuck" facial expressions in reaction to carrots is pretty darn funny, however.
     When Austin was a baby, every meal he ate came out of a jar. I never really considered cooking baby food for him, nor did I seem to have the time or energy to do so. As a preview for things to come, Austin was a big eater right from the start. As a tiny guy, he would eat an entire jar of vegetables in one sitting. As he got bigger, he was eating at least a big jar, sometimes even a little bit more. Thinking back, while our intentions were good in feeding him prepared baby purees, he was consuming quite a bit of sodium, sugar, and preservatives. And the cost was eating us out of house and home. Well, not quite, but you get the point. I can't remember exactly what we were paying, but I think it was around a dollar a jar.
     Being a little better organized and far more proficient in the kitchen this time around, I decided to investigate making my own purees for Lauren. I found a simple and straight-forward book at Chapters, "Blender Baby Food" by Nicole Young and Nadine Day. What really inspired me to buy it and try it was the authors' comments on how babies fed home-made foods generally became better eaters, more open to trying a diversity of foods, and usually became fruit and veggie lovers. That and the health benefits were motivation enough for me, although, of course, the financial savings was already a no-brainer for me. At the very least, I figured if cooking our own baby food worked out only for some of the time, I was still going to be ahead of the game in feeding Lauren well and saving a couple of bucks.
     The experiment has been a huge success, in my opinion. The time, mess, and equipment involved is minimal. I had originally thought I was going to need to buy a food processor, but the book says everything is blender-able. I've got a blender, but being a bit lazy around clean-up, I have only used my hand blender (the immersable kind.) In terms of preparation, all that's involved is peeling, finely chopping, briefly boiling then simmering, then pureeing of the vegetables in the water. While it's simmering, I'm doing something else. It's not like you have to stand over the stove the whole time while it's cooking, so really, there's not much time involved at all.
     The ratio of food to water is 2:1 in most cases, and the cooking specifics are bring to boil, then simmer 20 minutes before cooling and pureeing. That's it, that's all. Not nearly as mystical and complicated as I had first imagined.

     In terms of storage, Santa brought Lauren Baby Cubes, most likely from Toys R Us. Or actually, Santa did. While they're handy, they aren't necessary. I am also using a silicone ice cube tray, bought for $1.00 at the dollar store. With the ice cube tray, I just fill the cubes with puree, freeze it, then pop the frozen food cubes into a freezer bag on which I label the contents and date before firing it into the freezer. I usually put a day or two's worth in small jars or plastic storage containers in the fridge. The frozen stuff defrosts easily in the fridge or can be microwaved for about 20 seconds on the lowest power level to defrost.
     Aside from the nutritional benefits and hopefully, making Lauren a good eater, the cost savings has been staggering. For about $1.00, I can buy and prepare a vegetable that will make approximately 8 meals for Lauren. I've heard baby food is way more expensive in the stores now than it was when Austin ate it, so at a minimum, I am feeding Lauren for 8 times less than I did with Austin, probably more. Isn't that incredible?
     What's also nice is this method of cooking and feeding also ties in with a recent decision I made. I realized we were eating way too much prepared foods and vowed to do my best, within reason, to prepare more of our own foods and "eat closer to the source". More on that in a future post.
     Next up for Lauren's vegetables are parnips (should prove interesting, as I am not keen on these) and butternut squash (which I love.) I am then going to move on to pureed fruits. What I'm most looking forward to introducing is "guacamole for beginners". I think it will be the true test of whether Lauren will be a diverse eater like the rest of us. Fingers crossed that she will coo "Ole!"  

Courage, My Love

     As mentioned in my previous post, I have an annual birthday tradition of setting my intentions for the coming year. It's more about a theme or an attribute or character quality than making a list of resolutions. Having reflected and noodled for the past few days, I've decided the quality or attribute I most desire for 2010 is courage.
     The Oxford English dictionary defines courage as "the ability to do something that frightens one; strength in the face of pain or grief." While I don't consider myself to be a Cowardly Lion, there are some areas in my life in which I could use some courage, more courage, or just a different approach or a kick in the pants.
     I realize courage doesn't just appear. You have to work at it, often "faking it til you make it", as many self-help folk profess. I think you also have to ask for it, claim it, and even make a mantra of it. Regardless of how it comes, my hopes for the coming year include:

• Courage to focus my attention on "being" rather than "doing"
• Courage to better balance serving my needs and serving the needs of others. Women tend to put ourselves last, and we can be better moms, wives, friends, etc. by ensuring our own needs are met. It takes courage to make the time to have a little "me-time" but it is so necessary.
• Courage to speak up more. For others who need me to stick up for them, to encourage others, and to ensure my voice is heard for what I want or need.
• Courage to pursue my "big rocks" (important actions/goals) and to let my "sand" (busy-work) slide a bit. For insignificant tasks, the mantra "C+ works" is something I'll need to remember.
• Courage to take the time to write more, share my writing with others, and pursue my writing goals.
• Courage to delegate the "sand" at work and sink my teeth into "big rocks", paving a path to achieving my professional goals. Courage to remember professionalism is not a popularity contest and to be more conscious of who I am and what I am portraying at work.
• Courage to reach out to others in friendship. What's that old saying - "To have a friend you must first be one."
• Courage to allow myself the things I want. I am guilty of denying myself at times, thinking I don't 'deserve' it.
• Courage to let go of things that are no longer serving me, be it habits, clutter, time-wasters, toxic people, or negative thinking.
• Courage to say "yes" to things and more importantly, courage to say "no" when I need to.

     Most of all, for this new year, I ask for the courage to live this year in such a way that when I reflect back on it, I will have no regrets.
     My friends, I wish you nothing but good things for 2010. May you experience health, healing, happiness and peace. And may you have courage, plenty of it, to pursue your dreams in 2010.